I was flipping through everyone’s snapchat stories the other day, and I fell upon Lydia Millen’s update about keeping your confidence when other people put you down, and in her words, learning how important it is to “protect your positivity”.
That really resonated with me as like a lot of people, I tend to let other people’s opinions affect me personally.
It’s not an easy thing to put yourself out there on the internet every single day. I forget that people I know in real life read this blog, which is fine when I’m sat in the safe little cocoon of my bedroom, but not so great when people I barely know start questioning my life choices or judging my bikini selfies.
It’s hard not to let others perceptions of you get in the way of how you feel about yourself, but I’ve been trying to remember a few life lessons to help me ‘protect my positivity’ and build my confidence.
I don’t know how many years I spent wishing I was friendlier, thinner, had better skin and a smaller bum (I know right – why?!), but as I’ve grown a little older and more comfortable in my body, I honestly don’t know why I wished for any of that. It becomes so much easier to dismiss others judgements on your personality and body when you accept yourself for who you are. Learn to love your awkward communication skills and your wobbly thighs because at the end of the day, that person who’s judging you will walk away and forget about it leaving only you with the negative self-loathing. YOU DO YOU and all that…
Even if it’s not true, I’ve automatically learnt to wave off unnecessary offence as jealousy. If someone is trying to put you down about something then that’s usually the reason why. Sometimes though it’s really worth thinking about why that person is trying to bring you down – maybe they’re going through some issues themselves and don’t know how to express it. Sometimes a little empathy really helps to understand that hate has nothing to do with you, but everything to do with the person giving it.
Take A Step Back
There’ve been a couple of times when I’ve received some really biting comments which I’ve tried to push aside but just keep coming back to haunt me. Sometimes when others opinions get a little too much I just take a few days out away from everyone (hi anti-social). Sometimes a day spent with a cuppa, a book and my cat is enough to make me forget that people dislike me, and I can go back out there and forget that I’m weird and have chubby thighs (which by the way I fully accept)…
It’s a sad fact of life that unless you keep yourself locked in a closet forever, you’re going to experience some hate at some point. The only difference is how you handle it when it comes flying your way. I’d love to know how you all handle negativity (whether it’s in real life or online), so feel free to leave a comment below – any tips welcome! 😘